TheNightling
@TheNightling
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The blood Shower in The Vampire Lestat (Interview with The vampire Season 3):
I’m going to try to be as polite and gentle about this as possible but there are a lot of unkind names I want to throw around right now.
When I complained about the blood shower in The Vampire Lestat I got some weirdly confident replies that Lestat of the books would love it.
Now as someone who has an education above the second grade and read the damn books (I’m trying to be polite about this, I really am!) allow me to explain why I find this notion improbably STUPID!
1. Remember in Interview with The vampire when Lestat teaches Claudia to never drink from the dead? It got a whole generation of vampire horror fans thinking dead blood could kill a vampire even though no Anne Rice vampire ever actually died from drinking dead blood in film or books. In The Vampire Lestat novel, Lestat describes what happens to him when he drinks from the dead. He described it as feeling like a “Rolling delirium.” And it was temporary.
2. When blood stops circulating in a human body it immediately begins to putrify. The blood is no longer being oxygenated.
3. Blood outside of the body begins to congeal and coagulate. Even with modern methods of preservation, donated blood to blood banks don’t last long. The most fragile part of blood are the platelets. Platelets are what enable clotting when injured. Platelets have to be stored at room temperature and kept in motion or they turn into globs of what are essentially scabs. And even when following the right steps, platelets only will survive up to seven days. Plasma (the liquid part of the blood) can last up to a year but only if the other parts (red blood cells, white blood cells, and platelets) are removed. Unless Lestat’s tour bus has a high tech circulatory system for that blood it would be cold, and putrid. And even if they preserved it correctly it would only last upwards of seven days if it’s whole blood and not skim blood (Plasma).
4. There’s no attached heart beat. If we go by the novels the vampires experience a pleasure in the feeding process from living prey. The pounding the heart, the blood swoon, it’s not just “food.” And even if it was just food that brings me to point 5.
5. Let’s pretend blood is their favorite flood. And that’s all it is to them, flood. Think of your favorite soup. Now you tell me, you honestly tell me, if you’d want that poured over your head when you want to wash up after getting very sweaty from bouncing around on a stage. Or let’s pretend you really like hot chocolate. You’re sweaty, you’re tired, do you really want sticky, sugary, liquid pouring into your hair? How about French onion soup? It’s mostly beef broth. You want to swim in that? Who the Hell wants to shower in soup?!?
6. Anne Rice described her vampires as taking pride in the fact that they don’t splatter blood everywhere and have it running down their faces like in the movies. Another soup comparison here. You, as an adult, do you get chicken soup all over your face when eating? So why do the vampires in The Vampire Lestat / Interview with The Vampire TV series do that?
7. Lestat took pride in his own hunter instinct, seeking evil doers to satisfy his predatory drive. (Yet again, the show cheated us out of what was essentially vampire Dexter. Lestat was disgusted in the idea of vampires keeping human prey or over-feeding. He was revolted by the bloated and overly fed Azim, a vampire Akasha kills in The Queen of the damned novel. And now you think Lestat would douse himself in Campbells New England Clam Chowder (I need to drive the point home that he’s bathing in easily spolit food!) when he wants to clean off??!
I should not have had to explain all these things. It takes two seconds of critical thinking to realize how stupid the scenario is. “But it looks cool.” Grow up. There is such a thing as fantasy realism and Anne Rice balanced that beautifully with Gothic sensibilities. This show has none of that.
To quote my friend, Lorie Pringle, “It’s like those stupid blood fountains they sell as 3D chat room furniture on IMVU!”
__________________
Disclaimer: I am not a vampire.
I’m going to try to be as polite and gentle about this as possible but there are a lot of unkind names I want to throw around right now.
When I complained about the blood shower in The Vampire Lestat I got some weirdly confident replies that Lestat of the books would love it.
Now as someone who has an education above the second grade and read the damn books (I’m trying to be polite about this, I really am!) allow me to explain why I find this notion improbably STUPID!
1. Remember in Interview with The vampire when Lestat teaches Claudia to never drink from the dead? It got a whole generation of vampire horror fans thinking dead blood could kill a vampire even though no Anne Rice vampire ever actually died from drinking dead blood in film or books. In The Vampire Lestat novel, Lestat describes what happens to him when he drinks from the dead. He described it as feeling like a “Rolling delirium.” And it was temporary.
2. When blood stops circulating in a human body it immediately begins to putrify. The blood is no longer being oxygenated.
3. Blood outside of the body begins to congeal and coagulate. Even with modern methods of preservation, donated blood to blood banks don’t last long. The most fragile part of blood are the platelets. Platelets are what enable clotting when injured. Platelets have to be stored at room temperature and kept in motion or they turn into globs of what are essentially scabs. And even when following the right steps, platelets only will survive up to seven days. Plasma (the liquid part of the blood) can last up to a year but only if the other parts (red blood cells, white blood cells, and platelets) are removed. Unless Lestat’s tour bus has a high tech circulatory system for that blood it would be cold, and putrid. And even if they preserved it correctly it would only last upwards of seven days if it’s whole blood and not skim blood (Plasma).
4. There’s no attached heart beat. If we go by the novels the vampires experience a pleasure in the feeding process from living prey. The pounding the heart, the blood swoon, it’s not just “food.” And even if it was just food that brings me to point 5.
5. Let’s pretend blood is their favorite flood. And that’s all it is to them, flood. Think of your favorite soup. Now you tell me, you honestly tell me, if you’d want that poured over your head when you want to wash up after getting very sweaty from bouncing around on a stage. Or let’s pretend you really like hot chocolate. You’re sweaty, you’re tired, do you really want sticky, sugary, liquid pouring into your hair? How about French onion soup? It’s mostly beef broth. You want to swim in that? Who the Hell wants to shower in soup?!?
6. Anne Rice described her vampires as taking pride in the fact that they don’t splatter blood everywhere and have it running down their faces like in the movies. Another soup comparison here. You, as an adult, do you get chicken soup all over your face when eating? So why do the vampires in The Vampire Lestat / Interview with The Vampire TV series do that?
7. Lestat took pride in his own hunter instinct, seeking evil doers to satisfy his predatory drive. (Yet again, the show cheated us out of what was essentially vampire Dexter. Lestat was disgusted in the idea of vampires keeping human prey or over-feeding. He was revolted by the bloated and overly fed Azim, a vampire Akasha kills in The Queen of the damned novel. And now you think Lestat would douse himself in Campbells New England Clam Chowder (I need to drive the point home that he’s bathing in easily spolit food!) when he wants to clean off??!
I should not have had to explain all these things. It takes two seconds of critical thinking to realize how stupid the scenario is. “But it looks cool.” Grow up. There is such a thing as fantasy realism and Anne Rice balanced that beautifully with Gothic sensibilities. This show has none of that.
To quote my friend, Lorie Pringle, “It’s like those stupid blood fountains they sell as 3D chat room furniture on IMVU!”
__________________
Disclaimer: I am not a vampire.
